There is no god. I don’t understand why people waste so much time in pleasing someone who’s as real as WMDs in Iraq.
Tags
Ya it just happened minutes ago…he clinched the title in the last lap even though Massa won the race…all because of a silly Toyota which was just too slow…on lap 70 Vettel overtook Hamilton and sealed Massa’s first Championship title but both Vettel and Hamilton overtook a sluggish Glock on lap 71. I wanted Massa to be the Champion. Bloody hell…one more reason to get depressed now…Why Glock why???
This feeling is what differentiates people who are said to be suffering from social phobia from the normal people. You may joke about it. You might think ‘I don’t give a damn what those idiots think about me. I don’t care. I have got my life and I decide what I want to do about it’.
But suppose you went for an interview for that post of IT manager you have always wanted at Microsoft. Three top officials are sitting behind a table and they are observing you while you answer their questions. It is not just about getting the answers right, you want to be perfect in every sense. You want your clothing to be perfect – not too shabby but not too formal either as most IT companies prefer chilled out geeks. The way you speak, you should not be too authoritative nor should you be stammering or getting stuck in the middle of a sentence. You should not jump onto your answers before they finish asking the questions nor should there be a 30 sec delay for the answer to begin flowing from your mouth sitting below that well trimmed mustache (if you are a Mexican or an Indian). There is an element of fear. your heart rate goes up because just in case something goes wrong…that anxiety gets to you, releasing catecholamines in your blood stream, you get that flushed look, that sense of impending doom, you want to get out of there and just be alone and forget about it.
You take care of a lot of things which you don’t seem to care about in your normal day to day to life. This is where you are different from someone suffering from social phobia. To someone like me, the whole world is interviewing me 24*7. I have to be very careful about everything. I am concerned about what others think about me. Every single thing I do, like eating or walking or just normal (only to you) conversations, I am concerned of what the public thinks. I get a feeling that it is never adequate no matter how hard I try. I could have made a better impression on the people. It always seems to be going wrong.
So with time I learn that avoiding such situations helps a lot. If I sit in my room all day long I can do whatever I want, without the fear of people observing me. I am safe. Inside my room I am like a normal person. I am not self conscious. I am free to think about a lot of other things. things which normal people think all the time. You get to think what I go through daily only during interviews or during a date with that really hot girl you have been stalking for the past six weeks.
That’s the difference between you and me.
It is not that simple to overcome this fear. You cannot decide one day that from now on I am a normal human being and go out and start talking to people. It does not work. Because in case you did make such a decision and you are trying it out, you will end up thinking if I am doing this right or wrong. You end up worrying more about what you are doing than usual. This is just like trying to forget a bad incident in your life. the more you try to forget the more you tend to remember it for decades.
So all I have is a humble request to the normal human beings. Please do not mock us. What we have is truly a medical condition. We need help. We avoid people but that does not mean that we cannot be friends. We need your support. Eventually we will get accustomed to one or two of you and then we might actually be able to go out in the community.
Please. Please don’t laugh at us.
Why am I so bloody different from everyone else? I just want to be normal. Somebody please find a cure for irritable bowel syndrome. Please. I am desperate. I don’t think this condition is genetic as no one else in my family has this problem.
I suffer from Irritable Bowel Syndrome. I was also diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder. And I have social phobia. I don’t have any friends. I have lost my scholarship due to my depressive episodes during examinations. My dad is almost bankrupt. My brother hates me. My mom is neurotic. I have not talked to a soul in the last six days. I have not been attending classes either. Nobody seems to care about me. I sweat 281.97 gallons per second. I have only two pairs of formal clothes which i have to wear every other day to college. I have outgrown all the others. This is because I am afraid to go out and get new own clothes. I think of committing suicide daily. I am a stupid guy. I do not remember anything i read. My college has one of the best libraries in the country but I don’t go there because there are lots of people there. I love books. But it is not enough to overcome my social phobia. I don’t have any table manners. When I am around people talk about what a disgusting person I am. This is not a delusion. I stay shut in my room all day long. I order my food through the phone from nearby restaurants. I tremble and stutter when i pay the delivery guy. I lose hair as if someone has poured caustic soda on my head. I am surrounded by rich kids. I am left out from everything. I don’t talk to anyone in class. I sit in the last row since I am very much embarrassed by my bowel sounds. I have to go to the loo atleast 7 to 8 times a day. I suck at mathematics but i love physics. I can’t even do simple single digit calculations. I am not kidding. I would have gone for an engineering degree if I had been a bit better at mathematics. I am in the medical field now and through this I will be able to fulfill my dream of helping out the needy for free. But I can’t get anything done because of the wreck I have become. I doubt that I will pass out of college. I do not have any intention of using my patients as money making machines. Most of the people I know over here have the exact opposite ideas. I am a complete idiot. I can’t even understand simple concepts taught in class. If i do understand then i will forget it within a few hours I do not understand why I have been created. Or why I have to go on struggling pointlessly in a world which hates me. I just don’t get it.
Somebody please help me.
Autosomal dominant polycystic kidney disease(ADPKD), an interesting disorder which helpfully kills off a lot of idiots who are more concerned about their golf skills than about the malaria killing millions in Africa. I don’t like such people. But they are everywhere. Unfortunately the above mentioned disease is not.
This wonderful disease causes these idiots to develop some wonderful clear fluid or more deservingly blood tinged fluid filled cysts in both their kidneys. The kidneys look pretty cool on gross examination as it is basically an array of cysts stuck together by bits of actually functional parenchyma. By the way, in case you are too dumb to know what a cyst is or you are an American, go ask your mum. These cyst infested kidneys should be used by physicists to simulate irregular organic prisms. They should try shining a torch through it. Or disco club owners should hang them on the ceilings of their clubs. Hopefully one of these 4kg heavy weights might fall and kill Paris Hilton when she is busy whoring about. Go to the nearest church, become a believer and start praying for this.
Your mum might not know this, so I will tell you the basic pathogenesis. Tubular epithelial cells proliferate crazily while secreting ridiculously enormous amounts of whatever they normally secrete. I don’t know specifically what it is. It was not mentioned in the book. Try asking your grandma. So the cysts grow bigger, bigger, more bigger, still more bigger, and bigger, bigger, bigger, bigger, and if you are still reading this, bigger. Or in other words it thinks it is an American.
Since this is a hereditary disease with autosomal dominant pattern, all the kids you are planning to have with Jenna or Shirley are going to get it. There is no escape. You are doomed. Ha ha. Hmmm…that was a silly cheap laugh. I didn’t like it. Basically two genes are involved. One is called PKD1 and which encodes for a protein called Polycystin-1. As you might have already guessed (in case you are a crack baby, sorry…) the second gene is called PKD2 and it encodes for a protein called (again, sorry retarded crack babies) Polycystin-2. Both these proteins have an extramembraneous portion, an intramembraneous portion and a short cytoplasmic tail. I wanted to make those words bigger, that is why i avoided the hyphens in the previous sentence. They seem to regulate calcium ion concentrations in the cell. They are found on the cell membrane (polycystin-1 mainly) and on the endoplasmic reticulum (polycystin-2 mainly). Both the proteins might actually be two parts of a single large complex or they might be lie on top of each other when you depict whatever pathway they regulate in a flowchart. Please note that Americans and crack babies can’t make flowcharts. If they could, they would be living as undercover agents in Germany. And bang your head against the nearest wall and try to recollect the fact that calcium ions are second messengers and they regulate cell proliferation and fluid secretion.
Progressive renal failure ensues and eventually the affected idiot dies. Unless he or she is rich enough to afford dialysis and then subsequently acquire dialysis induced cysts. So if you are above 50 years old and you seem to pass coke in your urine (blood, you retards) , please call Plasmodium ( also known as your lawyer) and start making your will. If your doctor tells you that you have developed cool sounding things called azotemia and uremia, feel free to cheat on your wife. And get that damn Ferrari you have always wanted. This is also the right time to experiment with homosexuality if you have not done it yet.
PS: George W Bush is an idiot, for life.
I hate him
Are we going towards a world that will be ruled by one government? One single power constituted by a few men are going to control the whole world? We already have the European Union and the African Union and pretty soon we will have such organisations in pretty much every continent. And they might actually join to form a Eurasian Union and so on and we’ll end up with a World Union or something like that. Now, would that be good or bad?
I see a lot of problems for such a government to come to power. It is almost impossible to maintain law and order when there is such variety in human culture and beliefs. Just take the case of India. It is one country with thousands of totally different cultures and beliefs. The present democratic government is having a hard time keeping keeping all the people content. There is always some community or the other protesting that they are not treated equally and that they deserve better job opportunities and all. Basically i was referring to the reservations controversy going on in India. Or certain people have certain strict beliefs and customs which they want to be enforced as laws. This is what various religious organisations are trying to do. But such laws cannot be passed because there are a large number of people who think that these laws will be actual bullshit and that something else which they think is right(according to their beliefs) should replace them. Everybody cannot be kept happy at the same time.
People will end up fighting and the result will be a few more bloody wars for freedom like the olden times till little nations break away from the main nation. People should be given the liberty to do what they want. Nobody can control a person’s thoughts and beliefs. They should have the liberty to choose their government. The government is something which works for the people.
I don’t know what crap I’m typing down. I suck in the field of expression of my ideas. i typed a lot of gibberish above which isn’t going to make much sense to anyone. I can’t concentrate on anything for long. That’s why i keep on missing to explain what i promised to explain in the beginning.
Something bad happens to someone, you pity him and walk off with your life
Time will teach you a lesson, once you cross the threshold that is
Or you might actually get lucky
and end up laughing
If you do I guess you are either God or his protege
Amen
